A rocky marriage. Communication Will Help Get it Back on Track.
"The mystery of love is greater than the mystery of death.--Unknown
A rocky marriage is one that’s challenging to repair. Over 50% of today’s marriages end in divorce. What a sad statistic. What a shame that so many people choose divorce rather than communication. All of that hard work of trying to make it work. Setting up the household. Possibly starting a family. Dealing with in-laws and social friendships.
There is no question that every marriage is going to be perfect. Unfortunately some marriages are going to fail. There are too many insurmountable problems to overcome. But that’s no reason that half of the marriages should fail.
Was it a once in a lifetime fling? A partner finds out that there has been an affair going on. Why? What has driven him/her to take up with another person? Is each partner willing to sit down calmly and discuss the reasons that the affair has taken place? It’s not easy to do so. One partner will obviously be very upset with the guilty one.
If both parties will be honest with each other the chances are the affair can be overcome although feelings will be upset for a very long time. It takes a very open minded person to forgive. Possibly the cheating partner is relieved now that they have been caught. They may have got into the affair in a moment of stupidity and cannot figure out how to end it. So it carries on for some time. The cheating partner realizes that it is an affair without love and that their true love is waiting for them at home.
Has it Ended? That’s the big question. Can the partner be trusted not to do it again, or will they carry on. They were caught and after declaring that it is definitely over they are caught the second time. Perhaps in this situation it may be best to consider divorce. The number one factor in any marriage must be trust.
You must be able to trust your spouse entirely and completely. If they have made a foolish mistake and are caught, that’s one thing. It may make for a rocky marriage but if they promise they will never do it again and then turn around and do so they have broken that trust and the marriage is as good as over. They may try to save it but it will never be the same.
How long has it been since the Wedding? Setting up married life takes a long time. It’s like working for a university degree. It takes years to get to know each other really well. You get involved in purchasing a new home, decorating it, buying the furniture. Hobbies are pursued. Transportation problems need solving. The first years of married are indeed busy ones. If both partners manage to get through these trying times with more love and respect for each other then it is working.
However if one partner has an affair during this time getting it corrected and stopped may be just too much for the partnership to survive.
Staying married is one of the real challenges you may face.
Respect and love for you both must be present 24/7 and for a partner not to realize that and to play around so early in the marriage is not acceptable. It’s never acceptable but if it happens later on it may have something to do with other boredom or other events, but not in the early years of marriage.
We are all familiar with the expression “ location, location, location” as the answer to the question regarding the best three items for selling real estate.
We suggest the answer to the question “what three things will help a rocky marriage to succeed?” is “communication, communication, communication.”